Defining Life

I’ve had the distinct pleasure of growing up in a family full of COMPLETELY INSANE WOMEN. Yea. I mean, I love them. They’ve made life an interesting rollercoaster ride. Now that I am older, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I have learned the art of expression. They’ve also shown me how to laugh at things too soon. Out of my entire family, I was always “too soft.” I cried at the drop of a hat. In fact, my cousins use to have me ask my mom to take us to 7-11 and when my mom firmly declined they whisper to me that I should cry so she would say yes. She always did. My family has fought with words and fists. Some have gone years without speaking and some talk every day. Like my cousin Unique, who lived a parallel life to mine. We are best friends. However, she’s crazy and we all know it. Or my cousin Monique who used to comb my hair with a toothbrush. I’m not sure if it was used or not. There’s my aunt who buys a new bed every other month and tells use she’s just living her life...

" Yet knowing how way leads on to way,  I doubted if I should ever come back." -Robert Frost 2016 was not a bad year for me. Maybe because God shined his grace upon me. 2013 was my year of hell…and I think he knew mercy was needed. (insert hysterical laugh). Although 2016 wasn’t as painful for me as most, 2017 has been just what I’ve needed. A reawakening. A reigniting. I mean, there’s no fire blazing from within, but I have logically decided to do better. First, I started a fast with two of my coworkers. And let me just say, whomever decided that life without bread was acceptable is cruel. I’ve found myself crying out to the Lord asking him, “why hast thou forsaken me?” Soon I’ll start telling people to call me Mara. Forgive me for my bible college humor but I’ll have to put that student loan to use somehow. Ok…so… this fast has literally been the cleansing I’ve needed. I feel connected and energized as well as focused. And I am grateful for the accountability I...

“I met this boy when I was six years old and what I loved most he had so much soul…” So, I know Common was talking about Hip Hop, but this is my real life! I met… John (we’ll call him John) at… (John Elementary) when I was six. He was everything to me. He had pcurly hair and a beautiful smile. His skin was a soft caramel color and he played basketball. How could I not love him? I mean, I knew in that moment that we were going to be together forever. I told all my friends that he was mine. Knowing my mom was not having it, I still pretended. But I was a geek. I mean, like glasses, buck teeth, awkward dressing, horrible hair, and a weird shape. He didn’t love me back then. Well…apparently, awkward girls grow up to be pretty girls . With locs down my back, a crooked smile and full lips, and still rocking glasses, I ran into that boy…now man…and he all but chased me through the church. I have never felt more pursued in my entire adult life. It just so happens that the moment...